What makes a person a pleaser?
Think for a moment, whatever a person does in this world, does he do it for his convenience or for the recognition of his family or for the happiness of his family or spends his life to make others happy like a people pleaser?
The question may be a bit complicated, but this question is very important.
Many times a person kills his happiness and sacrifices a lot to please his society, relatives, friends, or colleagues. Why?
Its answer is to make his image right in front of others. To be liked by others.
So are those people not happy with you?
Or do you want to please them too much? Can you make them so happy that they give you their all?
Can this happen? Ask yourself?
Can a person be so happy with you that he would give up everything for you?
That will never happen, and the day you find out that the person you did so much to please didn’t support you through your worst times, you’ll be broken.
This is the truth of this world. It does not mean that you should not help needy people.
Helping someone in need is one thing, and being a people pleaser so that you can create a very good reputation in his mind is wrong.
A person or society remains happy with another person until his work is done.
Understand this thing by tying a knot. It is good for you.
It is wrong to be Yes-Man all the time. It’s wrong to be the person who gives up their time for free.
Why?
Because it reduces your value, it is not at all right to be present in front of a person all the time just to make them happy.
Keep one thing in mind.
The item with a very low price is sold very much, or people do not wait for that item.
But, the thing whose value is very high does not sell in the markets just like that, for that a person has to wait and has to pay a huge amount.
And, when he gets that precious thing, he also appreciates it very well.
Because he knows that if he loses this precious thing, he will never get it again.
So focus on empowering yourself rather than trying to make everyone happy or get in their good books.
Yes! Don’t insult any person. Don’t give a bitter answer to their words. It’s not necessary to follow their words but to listen to them carefully.
It is in your hands to implement their words or not.
But if you do any work thinking they will be happy, then believe your loss is certain. Thus, stop the need to be liked.
Follow the steps to stop pleasing people by doing harm to yourself.
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How to Stop Pleasing People? 5 Ways You Can Stop Being a People Pleaser
(1) Stop having a double character – learn to be who you are. Don’t force yourself to be fake to please people.
If you’re fake, people will use you too much, and you’ll be very unhappy living a double life or pretending to be nice.
(2) It is imperative to say no – it is wrong to always be there for others.
This takes a huge toll on your self-esteem. Attending everyone else’s work except your most important work to please others shows how much you are too frivolous, unemployed, or disorganised.
Due to this, instead of considering you great or good, people consider you weak and unintelligent.
(3) Avoid making promises you can’t fulfil – Sometimes, a person tries to be so truthful and nice in front of people that he starts making false promises to people.
Due to this, he gets financial and mental damage. In this situation, the person has to choose the wrong way to hide his lie or to save his false image.
And the person gets trapped in the quagmire of darkness.
(4) Do not hold back from having arguments – Be sure to give your suggestions or your arguments on anything, no matter how big or small the issue is, do not hold yourself back.
You have the right to speak your mind.
Only to please someone, and not having arguments may be wrong for you. Because sharing your point of view is the identity of an intellectual person, running away from any argument is called the identity of enslaved people.
(5) Know to whom you need to be good – No matter how much good work you do for people, people will not stop judging you.
In this situation, you should remember that no one of your own should be sad because of you.
You keep making other people happy, and your loved ones are getting sad. And you don’t care about that. It shouldn’t be like that. Instead, take care of your parents, be good to them, be good to your partner, be good to your kids, and be good to your family.
Keep one thing in mind that you never have to be fancy for your family. Because they belong to you, and you belong to them.
A great person has said that a friend of all can be a friend of none.
In the same way, one person can never make everyone happy. And when you try to make everyone happy, you can never choose a side — the right one — which will make you feel guilty. Therefore, never let your self-esteem suffer.
Live life freely, focusing on your health instead of being a people pleaser.
The person who has an attachment to you, that person himself, will walk near you and befriend you because of your true nature.
You need not be fake to connect with any person or organisation.
If you make friends with someone by being fake, you will never be able to put your point or suggestion in front of that person.
And due to this, you will always remain small in that person’s eyes.
This will create an inferiority complex, and you will lose your confidence.
Due to this, you will never be able to become a successful person in your life. So from today itself, stop being artificial in front of people. Stop pleasing people.
Avoid flattering people, make false promises to people and stop praising people.
I believe this article will help you to stop yourself from being a people pleaser. If you liked it, please share it as much as you can. And if you want to read more helpful articles like this, subscribe to our newsletter for free. You can also contact us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.
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That’s it; thank you.
Nathawat Brothers
Putting thoughts for everyone.