Through parents, a child gets the birth.
To keep their child safe, like a good parent, they nurture, educate, and even protect it from the social and economic view.
Even if somehow the parents cannot give all those things, the child will always be grateful for giving them life on this earth.
Yes, there are always exceptions.
Due to their social environment or personal understanding, some children create such a situation that makes them feel nothing sad about their parents in any way, even if their parents are going through some trouble or have died.
Those kinds of children always consider their parents as objects.
Now let’s talk about those children for whom their parents are the only higher authority.
These kids can fight any difficulty for their parents. Their whole world is their parents, and they only want to live under their shadows.
If the parents of these children go away from them forever. Or we can say, die, then these kids break down completely in the sorrow of their parents’ loss. They start to live their lives in sadness, pain, and grief.
But here, we need to understand that nobody’s parents live forever.
These kids need to understand that their parents gave them birth. They helped them grow, and they had to go when their time came.
The same will happen to you. You’ll do as good as you can for your children, and in the end, when your time comes, you have to surrender in front of death.
You’re lucky you’ve got some time to spend with your parents because some kids have lived their lives up to this point without any parents. Some kids’ parents left them when they were adolescents, so some saw the time curve when they were young–just like us brothers, who faced their father’s death when it was a time of joy.
Yes, those kids who have spent their time with their parents, who have great cherishable memories of them, will always feel the pain, the sorrow and the sadness.
However, it doesn’t mean you keep yourself away from your responsibilities and sob all day because you’ve lost your loved one.
Therefore, as long as your parents are living, stay in touch with them. Talk to them, sit with them. Try to bring a smile to their faces by trying things in your hand. Try to do everything you can. It doesn’t matter whether you are rich or poor.
What matters is that they are alive, and you’ve got plenty of time.
What Problems Arise After the Death of a Parent?
The difference between grief and fear is seen clearly.
However, a parent’s death can mix those two and show them as one.
Therefore, it’s essential to recognise both and not to make yourself miserable after your parents are gone.
What Does Grief Look Like?
You lost a parent now grieving because,
- You loved them.
- You cared for them.
You’re sad because you couldn’t do good for them. You’re regretting because you wanted to do good for them.
You’re sad because you couldn’t spend your time with your parents because you were tangled with your own intricate situations in your life. And of this, you have so much regret.
You are sad because your faithful friend to talk to you is no more. You are sad because your well-wisher who truly cared for you is no more.
What Does Fear Look Like?
Now let’s talk about the “fear” on which you put on the pyjamas of sorrow after the death of your parents.
It is called the sorrow of selfishness.
- If parents were here, there would have been no shortage of money.
- Your influence in the society would have remained intact.
- You didn’t have to understand your responsibilities.
- The problem of raising children wouldn’t have to arise.
- If the parents were here, no work would have stopped.
The tears of separation while remembering all these social and economic things after the death of one’s parents are tears of selfishness. One will suffer selflessly only when one has loved selflessly.
It can never be true to experience true sorrow just by walking together or living together.
More often than not, we remember our parents only when we feel there’s a need for them. Necessity itself makes one experience false sorrow.
There are many politicians, actors and sportspeople who are sad about the fact that their parents aren’t with them.
Their parents left this world when they were nothing.
And today, when they’ve become notable personalities in the world and have everything, their parents are not here to cherish those things with them.
This is what true sorrow and struggle look like.
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How Do You Recover From the Death of Your Parents?
#1—Only Death Is True:
Death is a universal truth; death is certain. You will be able to overcome grief only when you accept the truth. No one’s parents live forever. It is a law of nature that people have to leave this world.
#2—Identify the Cause of Sorrow:
Why are you sad about the death of your parents? Be sure to identify it. Do you have any selfishness in it? Or love? Or fear of future upheaval?
#3—Make Parents’ Life Successful:
Muster the courage to complete the incomplete work of your parents. You have to follow your objectives and duties while setting goals. And if you can’t complete your parents’ work, then dedicate your work to their lives.
#4—Cherish Memories:
Don’t be sad after seeing the photo of your parents. Use the memories of your parents not to feel sad but to set your goals and draw inspiration.
#5—Be Sure to Think About Your Family’s Future:
If you keep mourning the death of your parents, your family will become mentally weak. You have to think maturely and take care of your family.
#6—Be Sure to Take Help With Spirituality:
Spiritual knowledge helps you to overcome all the sorrows. Connecting with spirituality teaches you a new way of understanding life and death.
#7—Share Sorrow With a Trustworthy Friend or Family Member:
Do not suppress the grief caused by the death of your parents. Express it. This will lower the burden you are dragging with yourself. Perhaps a different perspective might open you up to better possibilities.
#8—Consult a Grief Counsellor:
It is very important to seek advice from a grief counsellor to end your grief, understand your conscience, and run your life smoothly.
#9—Pay Attention to Your Daily Routine:
Improve your daily routine and adopt a healthy lifestyle. It is important to stay busy and not let your sadness dominate your profession.
#10—Do Not Consume Intoxicants at All:
Using alcohol or drugs of any kind during grief can be the most painful thing for you or your family, worse than the death of your parents. This will lead you towards major mental and physical illnesses.
Addiction is not an answer to numbing sadness, whether you want to do it permanently or temporarily.
Death is not the end. It’s the completion of the life cycle. You have to understand it. And if you find it as an end, then it’s still not your end.
Also, the people you’ve lost can’t be brought back. They are dead for a reason, because everything happens for a reason.
Yes, they are gone, not here, but remember, they can never be forgotten.
Just keep this in your conscience and rise from where you are now because the people you’ve lost would have also wanted the same for you.
Go, wash your face, drink some water and start again because that’s life, and sometimes life hurts when the least we expect from it.
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Thank You
Nathawat Brothers
Putting thoughts for everyone.
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